I finally have it in ink! I've convinced my doctor to let me go back to work! I'm so excited I'm bouncing off the walls... its kinda like being put on parole. I still have a good 4 months of therapy and doc said surgery in the future is a possibility (I sure hope not, I'm SO done with surgeries)... but at this point, the fact that I can get out of this flippin house and get part of my life back is SO WONDERFUL!
I am a good 3-4 months ahead of schedule, and while I'd love to, wont be fighting fire anytime soon. Index finger is still broken, but I can still thump on a chest, push drugs, and granny tote.There will be a few things with a learning curve as I learn to adapt and figure out new ways to do things on the job, but it will be good occupational therapy to just get out there and do it!
So next Saturday is gonna be a good day! I know for all you guys who think I'm crazy just itching to get back to work... but then again, I just love my job and have the best crew you could ever ask for.
Tried riding this past weekend. 2 months to the day I got hurt, and while I have some mental blocks to get over, its the first baby step to get back out in the dirt!! Have a great holiday weekend. If you don't have plans and you live anywhere around north GA, Durhamtown is having an awesome Pro Freestyle Bike and Quad competition this weekend. I will be down there all weekend.... watching... ha ha ha, don't worry... this girl wont be trying any freestyling. Play hard... get dirty.
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
More rehab
I know some people do sustain injuries that incapacitate them life long... but working where I do, I have encountered my fair share of people milking the system. Now, after me being laid up for 2 months... I just don't know how they do it. I am going flippin NUTS sitting here at home! I want to go back to work... NOW! My therapist jokes that when I'm 50, I'm gonna wish I had taken half a year off. I severely doubt it. I don't care if I shovel shit at this point, I just need to do SOMETHING!
I feel clumsy at everything I do. This past weekend I went out to Durhamtown since my accident. Hung out with some friends and we planned on riding the quad, the bike and doing some fishing... mmmm... and maybe a little drinking. LOL. Lets just say that I had a good time fishing. I need to learn patience with myself. But I guess I had talked myself up in my head so much and being back out there... it was not fun.
I feel like the part of my spirit that was so "balls to the wall" wasn't there. Granted, the quad I was riding is 4x bigger than what I'm used to riding, but I felt like it was taking ME for a ride. The next day I rode the dirt bike and really didn't have a good time. Falling just simply was NOT an option that day. I felt out of control. I know a lot of that comes from my index finger still being broken and everything else on my hand being hyper-sensitive... but... BUT... I want to ride! I want my life back, dammit!
I've been thinking a lot over the last couple of days about being so skittish this past weekend. Ya know, before this accident, broken bones, sprains, abrasions.. whatever... yeah they hurt... but they HEAL. And since I wasn't doing anything spectacular when I crashed, I feel like.... crap, what happens when I fall again? Falls are just a part of the sport, they happen. Its just a mental block that I need to work through. And I just don't want to give up something that I love so much. I know... baby steps. That's like telling the Tasmanian Devil to slow down. I need to find something to be good at again! SOON! Frustration, awkwardness and clumsiness is running rampant right now. Hell it takes me 15 minutes just to put my hair in a ponytail!
If I can get back to work, even as the medic on the box, I'll be ecstatic. I can at least use my noggin and feel useful again. I am trying to talk my doctor into letting me go back to work... if I can go back soon, I'd be a good 3-4 months ahead of schedule. Therapy has been going well and almost every visit I have Dan shaking his head. LOL. Every week he creates new splints for me to improve mobility in my joints and tendons. So, we'll see.... stay tuned...
I feel clumsy at everything I do. This past weekend I went out to Durhamtown since my accident. Hung out with some friends and we planned on riding the quad, the bike and doing some fishing... mmmm... and maybe a little drinking. LOL. Lets just say that I had a good time fishing. I need to learn patience with myself. But I guess I had talked myself up in my head so much and being back out there... it was not fun.
I feel like the part of my spirit that was so "balls to the wall" wasn't there. Granted, the quad I was riding is 4x bigger than what I'm used to riding, but I felt like it was taking ME for a ride. The next day I rode the dirt bike and really didn't have a good time. Falling just simply was NOT an option that day. I felt out of control. I know a lot of that comes from my index finger still being broken and everything else on my hand being hyper-sensitive... but... BUT... I want to ride! I want my life back, dammit!
I've been thinking a lot over the last couple of days about being so skittish this past weekend. Ya know, before this accident, broken bones, sprains, abrasions.. whatever... yeah they hurt... but they HEAL. And since I wasn't doing anything spectacular when I crashed, I feel like.... crap, what happens when I fall again? Falls are just a part of the sport, they happen. Its just a mental block that I need to work through. And I just don't want to give up something that I love so much. I know... baby steps. That's like telling the Tasmanian Devil to slow down. I need to find something to be good at again! SOON! Frustration, awkwardness and clumsiness is running rampant right now. Hell it takes me 15 minutes just to put my hair in a ponytail!
If I can get back to work, even as the medic on the box, I'll be ecstatic. I can at least use my noggin and feel useful again. I am trying to talk my doctor into letting me go back to work... if I can go back soon, I'd be a good 3-4 months ahead of schedule. Therapy has been going well and almost every visit I have Dan shaking his head. LOL. Every week he creates new splints for me to improve mobility in my joints and tendons. So, we'll see.... stay tuned...
Sunday, May 06, 2007
Rehab
I am well underway into therapy and I think I have encountered almost every emotion. Since my last posting, I've seen my hand unwrapped and lost it. I've stiffened my upper lip, taken account of what I've lost, what I still have, met people who've lost more than me and have learned about true friends and what they're willing to do.
Shortly after writing my last entry, and letting the wounds start to heal from the skin graft surgery, I had my appointment to see my hand as it would be. My legs were continuing to burn and feel as if someone were stabbing me, my skin graft was not healing well and I was an all-around wreck. We added vsits to a neurologist to figure out why you couldnt even blow on my skin on my legs without me having a meltdown. Pain meds were maxed out and eating a sweet-tart had the same effect. Time is passing slowly. I oscillate pretty frequently between being all gung-ho and being frustrated and bitter.
Shortly after writing my last entry, and letting the wounds start to heal from the skin graft surgery, I had my appointment to see my hand as it would be. My legs were continuing to burn and feel as if someone were stabbing me, my skin graft was not healing well and I was an all-around wreck. We added vsits to a neurologist to figure out why you couldnt even blow on my skin on my legs without me having a meltdown. Pain meds were maxed out and eating a sweet-tart had the same effect. Time is passing slowly. I oscillate pretty frequently between being all gung-ho and being frustrated and bitter.
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