A stretch

I've been ignoring this thing lately... I suppose the whole point is to be able to go back and remember patients that I've encountered and skills that I may have used but once a year. A lot going on on the personal side of life that I am trying to stay distracted from. Getting dumped is never any fun. I am flying to Atlanta tomorrow to test for a county fire dept. I really hope I get, but on the other hand, staying in the place that everyday more becomes my home sounds pretty good too. A lot of things have fallen into place if I move South... a lot closer to my family, a nice place to stay, a fresh start, a good hockey team to play, and a good FOOLS chapter to hook up with.

But I will also be closing a chapter on a place that has been the birthplace of the last 12 years of my life. This is where I came to college, met my now ex-husband, started in the fire service, got my medic, and have some of the closest and dearest friends. Now, dont get me wrong... I'm not scared of moving. Just happy-sad. Hell I dont even have the job yet, but the antipication of it all makes it hard to keep everything balanced. I've moved 7 times since leaving home after high school. Whatever God has in store for me, I know He knows where I should be.

As for the last week or so of patients and calls... the one that sticks out in my mind is last night. She was a transfer back from the ER to her nursing home. 87 years old, hx of CVA, came in by squad with chest pain, and severly dehydrated. Doc wanted a line in her before we took her back. One of the ER nurses had been trying for a bit before we got there. A 22... a 24.. it didnt matter. You could see them pretty well thru her thin skin, but she couldnt hit any of them. Now like all medics and nurses out there.. you're watching someone trying to get an IV and you think, "Ah, come on... I could hit that blind-folded..." and you want to jump in and get it.. until you realize that you miss it too. This poor woman was stuck and restuck. We needed the line and this woman could do nothing but grunt and moan in pain as we kept trying to get the line. Her feet were an option but I do everything I can to avoid it. We finally get one above her AC. Dehydrated old veins suck. What made her prominent in my mind was her eyes. She understood that what we were doing was a necessary intervention, and she wanted to be anywhere than there, but if she had the strength and where-with-all, she probably would have clocked us and given us hell for sticking her so many times. I may go visit her next week in the nursing home. She had fire in those eyes... a spunk that was forced to be contained to her mind because of a stroke.

I've had my share of partners the last week. Mostly all good. I will just leave it at the ones who were frustrating... were "let me beat you with the clipboard" frustrating. But.. its only 12-24 hours. Nothing I cant live through. Well I am off to pack and square everything away. Have to go back into work for a short 6 hours later and have some running around to do.

I am standing on a cliff with a bridge that goes out across a chasm into a fog to my left and solid ground that is clear to my right. I've always been one for going out on my own and adventure. This will be fun to see where I go.....